After a promising two weeks of testing for the McLaren-Renault team, recently retired Fernando Alonso has been spotting milling about the pit lane ahead of the Australian GP wearing what appears to be the skin of new driver Lando Norris.
When asked why Alonso was wearing the slowly-decomposing skin of the young Brit, he told reporters in a poorly-emulated British accent, “I’m not Alonso. I’m Lando Morris ya cheeky bastard.” After being asked if he meant “Norris, not Morris,” Alonso insisted it was “tea time” and hurried away into the paddock, leaving a smear of blood behind him.
Lando Norris was not available for comment.
